Can You Control Word of Mouth?
That’s the question that made me sit up a little straighter in a session at NAIS this year — because the speaker’s answer was no. And we know through extensive market research that the answer to this very important question is a resounding yes.
I appreciate various viewpoints. I love a good conference. This year, I walked away from NAIS energized — the workshops, the speakers, the camaraderie, the tours. I learn what I agree with, and what I don’t. Two ideas in particular stayed with me this year — not because I embraced them, but because I think they deserve a closer look.
On Word of Mouth: You Have More Control Than You Think
A theme I heard from two separate associations was: control the things you can, and let go of the things you can’t. I wholeheartedly agree with that principle. But one application gave me pause. Specifically:
“Word of mouth — you can’t control it very well.” This is slide that was on display at the time.
I disagree. And we have proof.
You can absolutely shape your narrative. We see it every day — personally, professionally, politically.
Say it often. Say it clearly. And people begin to repeat it.
You control what you say, how you say it, and where it lands. There’s a reason word of mouth is the number one way families learn about schools. When real campus stories back your messaging strategy, it’s possible to shift brand perception in the market in an accurate and authentic direction. A clear brand generates more inquiries — mission-aligned ones — more applicants, more enrollment, and more affirmation of why families chose your school in the first place. Your community will actually enjoy sharing what I heard a colleague on an AISAP Zoom call describe as “points of pride.”
Let’s spend a moment on that concept. It’s an excellent place to start. Share what you’re most proud of. Sharing your points of pride shifts the narrative from confusing to contagious — and that momentum matters.
(Fair warning, though: what your school is most proud of may not be what a searching family finds most compelling. Bridging that gap takes market research. But don’t let that stop you from starting where you are.)
On NPS: The Wrong Tool for a Relational Context
The other idea that always gives me pause is using Net Promoter Score® as a measure of family satisfaction. Here’s my concern.
A parent’s relationship with a school is relational, not transactional. A family might have a frustrating moment — a billing issue, a coach conflict, a miscommunication — and still send their child back in the fall without a second thought. How you handle that moment matters far more than the score it generates. And NPS doesn’t capture that. When you send the survey matters. What else is happening in that family’s life matters. You might get a low score on a Tuesday and a high one from the same person the following week.
I’ve seen too many heads of school take this number too hard. NPS was designed for things like point-of-purchase products — not for the layered, evolving relationship between a family and a school community. It simply doesn’t account for nuance.
There are better approaches. Consider making your “likelihood to recommend” question a simple three-point scale: Yes, No, Maybe. Then ask why. You’ll learn far more.
What I’m Carrying Forward from a “Small Conference in Seattle”
The throughline from this year’s conference comes down to three things you can control:
- Your narrative — shape it deliberately and consistently
- Your community’s stories — engage them to share what matters
- How you measure success — choose tools that reflect the relationships you’re actually building
None of these requires a perfect system or a huge budget. They require intention. Start there, and the momentum follows.
See you at the AISNE Women’s Leadership Symposium in New Hampshire or AISAP’s Annual Institute this June in New Mexico — where you too can take a closer look and hopefully carry ideas forward from my session, Harness the Power of Word-of-Mouth Marketing: A 5-Step Framework.